gameday texts: sequence 6

This week's edition of "Gameday Texts," like the version from 2 weeks ago, suffers from a few unforeseen circumstances: namely, AT&T service on Gameday is lousy (too much activity, I suppose). Also, an added wrinkle this week: Dad traveled with me to the game this week, meaning he has no entries in the text category (officially he says, "No comment"). As always, if you have texts you'd like to add, feel free to comment or do so on Twitter.

On we go.

Pedro (9:38 a.m.): Cam Newton — before stole our hearts, he stole our laptops.
Stacey (10:14 a.m.): Want me to call and karaoke Bon Jovi's "Always?"
Halcombe (10:37 a.m.): Bigger annoyance: Erin's choice of scarf or Herbie holding his pen like a mad day trader?

Halcombe (10:39 a.m.): I think if you put a hunk of cheddar in front of Tom Rinaldi he would become the rodent we all know him to be. I mean look at his teeth.

Halcombe (11:05 a.m.): Let's see, so Russ the Bulldog performed "admirably" according to Dari Nowkah? He licked himself and sat in an air conditioned doghouse. If that is so, then I perform admirably as well.

Pedro (11:10 a.m.): I'm glad the artsy folks at Kentuck are more skilled at port-a-potty locks than middle-aged women on the quad.

Halcombe (12:04 p.m.): Wouldn't be just like Ron Zook to beat Michigan State today and then go on a six-game losing streak and get fired at the end of the year?
Whit (12:59 p.m.): When you're in Texas look behind you.

Halcombe (1:57 p.m.): Third-grader statement of the obvious: "Vandy sure ain't very good."

Jamie (2:35 p.m.): (regarding level of nervousness) 5 — relative to preseason expectations.
Jamie (2:37 p.m.): 8 beers ago, nervous level was elevated.

Jamie (2:57 p.m.): Our one chance to score every possession is done. It was a good run.

Jamie (3:09 p.m.): That's 6-6 250 that you tasted 31.
Pedro (3:18 p.m.): The Mrs. on Chizik — "He's such a goob. Is that a wad of chew in his mouth?"
Pedro (3:22 p.m.): "If it's Dentyne, he's got the whole freakin' pack in there." Also, I'm impressed that Verne could mispronounce Mario Fannin's name — Mary-Oh.

Jamie (3:26 p.m.): I've asked this before but why listen to Bramblett? Like me listening to Jay Barker. I can't take homerism from my own side much less the other.

Eric St. Clair (3:31 p.m.): Kickers pumping their fists piss me off.

Jamie (3:41 p.m.): No idea why 80,000 people are booing. When you wrap your arms around a receiver, it will get called.
Pedro (3:46 p.m.): That Arky receiver went to the Nick Rymer School of Deception.

Whit (3:52 p.m.): Auburn apparently paying referees.
Jamie (3:52 p.m.): From the stands, with no review, that is a horrible call.
Maguire (3:53 p.m.): SEC officials have no concept of logic.
Whit (3:54 p.m.): CHEATER.
Pedro (3:54 p.m.): Helps us if AU is unbeaten, I suppose, but Arky got hosed on that one.

Maguire (4:23 p.m.): Ryan Pugh: the dirtiest player in college football, and also either deaf or an idiot.

Chad C (4:48 p.m.): (in response to Mallett's injury) Why the hell didn't we do that?

Halcombe (5:17 p.m.): Cam Newton did his best "Get to da choppa" dive. And now I must slap Scott van Pelt for keeping that in the back of my head.
Jamie (5:18 p.m.): McCalebb broke 1 tackle and almost housed it. Imagine if he could break 2!!

Chad C (5:21 p.m.): First one to 100 wins???
Jamie (5:46 p.m.): Basketball season is here.

Jamie (5:49 p.m.): This is really pathetic.

Whit (5:57 p.m.): Reeediculous.
Chad C (5:57 p.m.): We called it down. Apparently, they didn't hear us.
Jamie (5:57 p.m.): A win and Roof's head would be the ultimate.

Halcombe (6:00 p.m.): The real beauty of ESPN is the fact that they will somehow very poorly segue between the Ark-Aub game to the Miami Heat's latest preseason game. An artform.

Pedro (6:01 p.m.): What's the over/under on number of weeks this officiating crew gets a "vacation?"

Jamie (6:03 p.m.): Told you to take the over.
(Note: No he didn't.)

Jamie (6:11 p.m.): Imagine how many we could score with a stop or two.

Halcombe (7:48 p.m.): Actual comment by my 2-year-old when seeing Desmond Howard during Gameday halftime show: "Dare's da 'Merica's Got Talent man. Dat's him."

Maguire (8:07 p.m.): I think Jamie Christensen just walked past us. I started to yell "Money!" but thought better of it.

Pedro (8:17 p.m.): I gotta say — I'm kinda enjoying Eli doing play-by-play off the ESPN2 broadcast. Looks like parity is the word of the day for the east.
Chad C (8:20 p.m.): Eli Gold just said the KY fans are headed to cut down the B-ball nets after tonight's big win vs. SC.

Jamie (8:27 p.m.): Got blocked into him.
Maguire (8:41 p.m.): There's the Dont'a we know and love. And Ole Piss is a bunch of thugs.

Jamie (9:04 p.m.): State beats UF.
Maguire (9:11 p.m.): Will Urban Meyer die before Florida fans can call for his head?

Maguire (9:23 p.m.): Dammit! I'm sick of settling for 3 in the red zone. Feels too much like the Shula era.

Maguire (9:29 p.m.): DAMMIT.
Jamie (9:44 p.m.): McElroy has Jason Campbell Syndrome.

Jamie (9:51 p.m.): Holly Rowe just performed the most difficult task in sideline reporting: interview Nick Saban.

Jamie (9:52 p.m.): (on the possibility of Auburn scoring 70 vs. Ole Miss) Maybe. And we'll win by 10.
Jamie (9:58 p.m.): (on revising that to 750) Either way, we win by 10.

Jamie (10:09 p.m.): Ole Miss = 41 total yards. Gulp.

Maguire (10:51 p.m.): Is it me, or has this 3rd quarter been going on for about an hour?
Jamie (10:55 p.m.): 3 losses in the past 31 games should test anyone's patience.

Jamie (10:57 p.m.): Milliner is a liability at this point.

Maguire (11:35 p.m.): 6-1. Wasn't pretty, but I'll take it. We're sure gonna need that bye week. Roll Tide.

Amanda von (1:22 p.m., Sunday): Send the rev another text at 12:28 a.m. Sunday and you'll lose both your thumbs. You woke me AND my ire.