Tuesday, February 16, 2010

"Lost" blogging: The Substitute

Welcome back to "Lost" blogging, this site's feeble attempt at comprehending some small part of ABC's multi-layered drama. This week's episode is titled "The Substitute." Please note: because this site's proprietor has recently discovered the magic of TiVo (welcome to 2004, Heath family!), tonight's timing will be slightly delayed (owing to my desire to skip all commercials). Also please note: SPOILERS, SPOILERS, SPOILERS.

Questions to ponder before tonight's episode:
• Where is FLocke going with poor Richard Alpert?
• What will become of poor Sayid, who's apparently been "claimed" by the bad guys?
• Is Claire alive? And why?
• Where does the sideways world interact with this world?
• Have I completely lost my mind?

(All times are CST.)
8:21: Every time I see a wheelchair lift, I think of Joe Swanson. Can't help it.

8:22: Whaddaya know, it's Helen! John's lovely woman apparently didn't leave him in the sideways universe. And apparently they're engaged? Maybe it's not so good, after all.
(I'm kidding. Marriage is wonderful.)
8:24: Drink every time someone says the word "destiny" or "free will."
8:24: As an aside, even though I love everything about this show, I must admit the "Smoke Monster" CGI is eerily reminiscent of something you'd see in one of those terrible Sci-Fi Channel movies.

8:27: Do you think Sideways Locke actually went on the Walkabout? Even in his wheelchair?
Remember that in the real world (or "first run" world, as it may be) Locke went to Australia for the expressed purpose of going ON the Walkabout — he even took a solid ribbing from his boss before he went. So this is an altogether different universe. Although his boss is still a jerk.
8:30: John's a candidate ... for what, exactly?
8:30: Two things about this conversation:
• FLocke is promising to "tell you everything" if the subject will do what he wants ... just like the Other Others did to Jack last week.
• Locke's mention of a "second chance" is pretty ... ironic.

8:32: Did FLocke just see He-Man in the jungle? I'm really confused.
8:33: The real reason no one believes Ben is that he very rarely tells the truth.
8:34: FLocke is recruiting? He should totally talk to Nick Saban and Urban Meyer.
(OK, that was a lame joke.)
8:35: Anybody recognize that tune? I sure don't.
Random theory: Could FLocke BE Death? Time for another Family Guy reference!


8:39: Think Sawyer will play "Never Have I Ever" with FLocke? And what exactly happened to Kate?
8:40: Whose house? RUN'S HOUSE!!!
8:41: Hurley's SUV is blocking Locke in. Pretty funny.
8:42: In the Sideways universe, Hurley is "the luckiest man alive." And Locke is a loser. But ... he does have a number of people willing to help him, including Locke and Jack.
8:44: When last we saw Jin, the poor guy had his ankle caught in a bear trap. Not a fantastic fate.
8:45: Wait a second: the child is Aaron, right? Right? Has to be.
FLocke has the same problem with authority that Real Locke does.

8:48: Is it me, or does Sawyer sober up really quickly? Shouldn't he still be drunk?
8:49: Maybe he'd describe himself a Giant Smoke Monster?
8:50: Hey, it's Rose! How awesome. In the sideways world, she still has cancer. That blows. Remember: Rose and Locke were the two people healed by crashing on the Island, which is why they didn't want to leave.
8:51: Sawyer's made reference to "Of Mice and Men" before.
8:52: I just noticed that Sawyer is left-handed. A possible reason for his trouble.
8:53: So here's a valid question: why on God's earth would Sawyer continue to follow this ... whatever he is? Remember the lesson of Malcolm Gladwell's "Blink" ... if someone's giving you a bad vibe, that's probably for a reason. Run the other way, and do so quickly.

8:56: Burying Real John Locke is arguably the most poetic justice there is. Having Ben, who killed him, speaking at his funeral ... not so much. And let's remember: Ben actually tried to kill him on multiple occasions.
8:57: I remain convinced that Frank Lapidus was put on this show to speak for people like me.
8:59: If they found Locke's lost luggage, does that mean they found Jack's, also?
9:00: Recall that in "the real world," Locke's "Helen" who he tried to get to go with him on the Walkabout, was actually a call girl. At least in the sideways world he's with somebody.
9:01: For the moment, anyway.
9:02: Just an aside: didn't Helen mention something about inviting his dad to the festivities? Wasn't it his dad who paralyzed him? Am I missing something?
9:03: This seems eerily similar to that episode in Season 3 where Ben conned Sawyer into thinking he had a lethal device implanted in his heart. Or something.
9:05: That bit with the stones on a scale was missing the rat crawling across the background with the word "SYMBOLISM" flashing on a billboard.
9:06: Actually, the rock sort of looks like Chimney Rock at Lake Martin.

9:07: So ... Sideways Locke became a volleyball coach? How fantastic is that.
9:08: And in the Sideways World, Ben Linus is a teacher? European History? Good grief.
9:09: Note that each name appears to ahve a number next to it. #23: Shephard. #8: Reyes. #16: Jarrah. #42: Kwon. #4: Locke. #15: Ford.
9:12: FLocke says "it's just an Island." Real Locke said it is "a place where miracles happen."
(Note to Sawyer: Just light the dude on fire already & get it over with.)
[end of episode]

As always, please add your own thoughts in the commentary section. I can use the help.


Bran D. Strickland said...

So...it's all a game of Backgammon then? So many references to it early on, and the repeated black stone/white stone symbolism, etc.

If I knew how to play the damn game this would be easier, I guess. Apparently one wins by clearing all his pieces from the board...hence Richard trying to tell Sawyer Locke wanted all of his friends dead?

Justin and Marcie said...

Dude...I'm loving your Lost blogs...but I'm loving the family guy references EVEN MORE!!!! These are two of my fav shows :)