Monday, December 5, 2011

gameday texts: championship week edition

Planning to have a few thoughts up later about the ongoing nightmare that is the BCS. For now, enjoy some of the text messages that kept me entertained through "Championship Weekend." As always, some language is less than savory and may possibly be offensive. You've been warned.

Whit (9:34 a.m.) Herbstreit laughs like a small girl

Halcombe (10:03 a.m.) If your name was Dabo would you embrace it? Or would you get to the courthouse by 9 a.m. Monday and switch it to Derek or Dave?
me (10:45 a.m.) His actual given name is William Christopher. The name "Dabo" apparently comes from his brother, who was attempting to say "That boy."
Halcombe (11:06 a.m.) We call our youngest Cub because he had chubby cheeks when born. I sincerely hope when he's making six figures people will say "Simon."

Halcombe (11:10 a.m.) ESPN had a "What's at stake" infographic for Cincy-Conn. game. Answer: Some crappy matchup in the Sugar or Orange Bowl.

Rob (11:49 a.m.) Atlanta smells like corn dogs
me (11:50 a.m.) What does it normally smell like?
Rob (11:50 a.m.) Ludacris

me (1:35 p.m.) Sirius' idea to kill 3 hours at Ga Dome: Have Finebaum troll UGA fans by asking them if they really want to win today (since it means they'll keep Richt).
Rob (1:36 p.m.) Uga fans are fickle they think richt is the second coming again
Rob (1:37p.m.) Considering they didn't play the big three they won't be so happy next year

me (2:14 p.m.) As a UAB alum, I do not approve of USM's performance today. Could've used that BCS payout in C-USA.
Rob (2:15 p.m.) Yeah case Houston would have been embarrassed in a bcs game
Jamie (2:16 p.m.) Too much money and uab will be just be ub.
Halcombe (2:18 p.m.) It figures something associated with Brett Favre would screw up an otherwise good BCS storyline.

Halcombe (3:04 p.m.) They should have flown the cast of Swamp People into Atlanta and sat them beside the cast of Wives of Atlanta. Imagine those cutaways? Back to you, Verne.

Whit (3:14 p.m.) Is it weird that I hope jordan jefferson gets hurt?
Whit (3:15 p.m.) Make me a terrible person?

Halcombe (3:57 p.m.) If UGA wins I may just take you up on the job offer in ALA. No one will be able to put up with UGA fans if they win. "Yeah, we should be in the BCS title game."
me (4:07 p.m.) Don't sweat it just yet. Remember Arkansas was up 14-0 last week.
Halcombe (4:11 p.m.) Whew! I'm almost done with our 15-year fixed refi and wasn't in the mood to list the house. I got 3.5 percent! What were we talking about?

me (4:28 p.m.) Verne thinks every handoff is a draw play.
me (4:31 p.m.) I counted 5 knockout shots on that return.
Whit (4:32 p.m.) Two uga players hit in back on that return. and yeah, they're hitting hard
Jonathan Page (4:33 p.m.) Yeah, are we sure Mathieu didn't flip the ball into the end zone before hitting the plane?

me (4:37 p.m.) Verne: "I looked up Honey Badger." Translation: "I had our interns look it up."
Rob (4:38 p.m.) I learned how to use the interweb
Whit (4:38 p.m.) Wikipedia, verne? You're better than that
Jonathan Page (4:38 p.m.) And now Wikipedia had a CBS citation

me (4:48 p.m.) Stand by for killer UGA turnover.
Whit (4:48 p.m.) Ohhhhhh yeah it's coming
Jonathan Page (4:50 p.m.) I knew it!!
Halcombe (4:50 p.m.) Conspiracy theorists commence "They want LSU to win" blogging following Mathieu TD toss in 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...

Jamie (5:01 p.m.) What was the line on the tuition toss?
Halcombe (5:01 p.m.) I have no suitable joke for the Dr. Pepper contest. The wife said she's pulling for the Pre-Nursing student who's playing it like a FT contest.

Halcombe (5:26 p.m.) The back of Verne's hair reminds me of the dude who "chose poorly" in Indy and the Last Crusade.

Halcombe (5:28 p.m.) Little ahead of yourself on that heartbreak turnover ... but good call nonetheless.

Whit (5:30 p.m.) Draw play?
me (5:30 p.m.) A counter-trap. Not a draw. You dick.
Jamie (5:31 p.m.) At least they weren't running from the shotgun aka spread.

Jonathan Page (5:31 p.m.) "we didn't have this footage of Mathieu flipping the ball til later" just say it Gary, we f---ed up


me (5:41 p.m.) "This guy deserves to be in the Heisman race!" — Every a-hole with a microphone

me (5:53 p.m.) Let us all think back fondly to last year's SECCG, when Tracy Wolfson decided to sample "Cammy Cam Juice."
Whit (5:54 p.m.) Yeah. Good times. Roll tide
Rob (5:54 p.m.) Haha yeah she did!! I think she is pregnant now
Jamie (5:54 p.m.) I'd be willing to bet she wasn't the only female who gargled cammy cam juice last year.

Maguire (5:47 p.m.) I just finished changing the glow plugs in the Suburban. Is there a football game on?

Dad (5:47 p.m.) Tell Ga nice try ... maybe next year.

Jonathan Page (5:52 p.m.) Just accused a guy of being a fair-weather fan after pronouncing #7's name as ma-thay-u. He turned into a 10 yr old girl fast.

me (5:59 p.m.) Nobody in college football makes a better "What the fck was that?" face than Aaron Murray.
Halcombe (6:12 p.m.) Murray cupping hands to signal a "back to the womb" approach for the remaining 18:06.

me (6:16 p.m.) Game has played out like an old-school wrestling match. With UGA playing the role of jobber.

Jonathan Page (6:24 p.m.) Verne, Gary ... Pay attention to the damn field, that's how you tell the difference between a horse collar and a face mask

me (6:30 p.m.) Yes, Gary, Mark Richt did a great job beating 10 teams that weren't worth a damn. Inspiring.

Travis P (6:33 p.m.) Hey Gary. Fuxk you — Celo green

Jamie (6:35 p.m.) My sports book had lsu alabama already on the board at noon today. What does that tell you?

Pedro (6:47 p.m.) Nice draw play

Jamie (6:57 p.m.) these guys have done this to every team except 1. No other way to have it than what it will be. One of the best teams in the bcs era will not win the title this year.

Jamie (7:42 p.m.) Justin Blackmon says "f the knee pads"

Halcombe (8:00 p.m.) The wife asked what the VT bird
a) is? and
b) called?
I don't have the answer.
me (8:17 p.m.) You won't believe me, but the answer to both questions is "Fighting Gobbler."

Rob (8:05 p.m.) The Clemson tiger looks like it is on meth

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