gameday texts: sequence 2

Here's the continuation of our "gameday texts" series, concluding with a Monday text I received from my Peter about what he may or may not have seen at the hospital. Draw conclusions at your leisure. Fair warning: my phone died halfway through the game Saturday, so this Saturday's version may be a tad light. Have fun.

Dad (10:18 a.m.): She stumped her toe and complains a lot.
Maguire (11:10 a.m.): You're at Duke, and it's not basketball season yet.
Whit (11:10 a.m.): You should feel confused. Your IQ just jumped 15 points as you entered campus. Who knows ... maybe you'll join those two in the library with their books ... scary.
Maguire (12:24 p.m.): UGA is sloppy on D and special teams. They better shape up quickly or it will get ugly.
Maguire (12:25 p.m.): And yes, I'd punch Mallett in the face. He looks like Ivan Drago, but I bet he's a lot softer.
Jamie (12:30 p.m.): Some Doritos late night cheeseburger would hit the spot right now.
Dad (12:45 p.m.): I love potato salad! Don't you?
Rob (1:35 p.m.): How bad is Ole Sis?
Jamie: Stand alone (in Cameron Indoor Stadium), and for 30 straight minutes jump up and down yelling: "ooooooohhhhhhhhhooooohhhhhhoooohhhhhhhooohhhhhh!!!!"
Dad (2:25 p.m.): An this feller said "have a drink!"
Whit (2:33 p.m.): Vandy!
Chad C. (2:58 p.m.): How bad you think their (Duke's) frat boys are?
Maguire (2:59 p.m.): Another good reason to hate Dook.
Halcombe (3:09 p.m.): Chris Collins said he was busy sipping a mimosa at a brunch with some influential Republican senator: "What did you say? Huh hah ha ha ha!"
Maguire (3:19 p.m.): Mallett sounds like an inner-city youth.
Jamie (3:33 p.m.): Um, few 'Bama fans there?
Maguire (3:43 p.m.): Welcome back, Mark. We missed you.
Jamie (3:45 p.m.): From TV looks like Duke brought a good group to BDS.
Chad C. (3:54 p.m.): Time to start the "Rammer Jammer" cheer?
Maguire (3:56 p.m.): This could get out of hand in a hurry.
Maguire (3:58 p.m.): And welcome back to you too, Marcell.
Maguire (4:09 p.m.): Dook's #4 was pulling hard on Mark's left leg. F@&!$ stupid thug. I would have pushed him too. You have no chance to win, so you try to hurt somebody.
Halcombe (4:09 p.m.): Verne, just heard Urban's heart exploded on that failed fourth down. Back to you.
Bart (4:16 p.m.): Real funny, guys. Who set difficulty on Junior Varsity?
Halcombe (4:17 p.m.): Ingram has a higher ypr right now than Percy Harvi has yam (yet another migraine).
Whit (4:20 p.m.): He's been watching Jamie Christensen's highlight films.
Whit (4:22 p.m.): Saban at halftime — "We are not dominating the game on defense like we should be." Roll Tide.
Maguire (4:46 p.m.): That really escalated quickly.
Halcombe (4:46 p.m.): Wonder if your UA tight end's nickname is "Soap?"
Rob (4:47 p.m.): Not a bad showing by the Heisman winner.
Maguire (4:48 p.m.): Yeah, it really got out of hand.
Maguire (5:02 p.m.): Whoo! Way to make up for the near fumble.
Bart (5:26 p.m.): Two fumbles, two games. Say goodbye to Lacey.
Maguire (5:41 p.m.): Did ALL the Dook fans leave after the 3rd?
Chad C. (5:42 p.m.): Rumor in Alabama: Saban is walking the stands asking fans if they want to play the rest of the game. What number are you gonna be?
Maguire (6:07 p.m.): 3-0. Roll Tide.
Dad (7:39 p.m.): Did you enjoy the Nutt era at Ole Miss?
Whit (7:41 p.m.): Auburn playing like Opelika High School.
Jamie (8:14 p.m.): Needless to say the Cam Newton Gameday signs might rip tonight.
Maguire (9:56 p.m.): Lucky sons of bitches.
Maguire (10:51 p.m.): Haha! Gutsy call, MSU head coach. To hell with Notre Damn.
Monday (bonus text)
Pedro (3:21 p.m.): Think Ingram's hurt — pretty sure I just saw him getting rolled out of the elevator at DCH.